Christie (sam_can_do_it) wrote in sortinghat_fics,

Title: Mistletoe
Rating: G
Characters/Pairing(s): Twins, Lee, Draco, Snape and mentions of others
Warnings: Boy kissing
Disclaimer: I own nothing
Feedback: Always, I’m a comment-whore
Summary: The twins come up with a prank worthy of the Tri-wizard Tournament
Word Count: 1211

“Think Fred. This is the year of the Tri-Wizard Tournament! We’ve got a Yule Ball instead of a Christmas Feast. We’ve got to do something fantastic for our Christmas prank. Nothing childish, this needs to be romanced themed.”

“George, did you actually think you needed to convince me? I know we need a good prank this year, and I like your ‘romance’ idea. So, now tell me your plan.”

“Mistletoe! Don’t give me that look Fred. I know. The school’s already covered with mistletoe, but we replace it with this mistletoe!” George produced a sprig of mistletoe from his pocket.

Fred looked at the small plant skeptically. “Looks pretty normal to me!”

“That’s the point! It looks normal, but when you step under it, you get stuck. There is a charm on each bunch that makes the victim incapable of moving until they get kissed. Normal mistletoe only works if you stop walking, someone notices and that someone wants to kiss you. This stuff forces the kiss or our helpless victims are permanently stuck.”

“Good, but we need a climax to this prank. We MUST have an ultimate victim and I’ve got an idea for that.”


“So, boys, what are the current updates on phase one?” Lee Jordan asked. The twins decided this is one of those pranks they may need his help on.

“Fred’s got the list of who we’ve witnessed being caught.”

“Well, let’s see. Ginny got caught by the piece over by the statue of the one-eyed hag. Draco was her chivalrous rescuer.”

“Yeah, luckily we’ve raised our baby sister right and she gave him a fat lip and hexed him into next week.”

“Fleur got stuck under the piece right in the great hall, and there was such a rush of people to save her, she was physically knocked out of the charm field and therefore knocked unconscious for three hours.”

“We sent her some chocolates for that. I didn’t expect that sort of a side effect.”

“Neville got caught up near Gryffindor common room and that goofy little blonde bird, Lovegood I think, the Ravenclaw in Ginny’s year; she walked up planted a rather sloppy kiss on his cheek and the poor bloke nearly passed out.”

“Is that boy really a Gryffindor?”

“Our dear friend Lee snaked a kiss out of our dear friend and teammate, Katie.”

“I didn’t trick her. I just sort of lead her in the proper direction,” Lee barked defensively.

“Sure you did,” Fred smirked at him. “Continuing, Dean got caught on the way to divination. Seamus just planted a big wet sloppy kiss smack on his lips. They were laughing about it for a good long time.”

“I really think those two have potential for being damned good pranksters when we leave this place.”

“I didn’t think it would work on animals, but Mrs. Norris got stuck. The damned flea bag was yowling for nearly half a day down by the kitchens. No one saw who finally kissed the mangy beast, but she’s free again.”

“I’d bet all the galleons in Gringots that it was Filch.”

“I’ve seen Ron stumble into the stuff at least five times and he always manages to do it when the only one around is Harry.”

“I’m beginning to think it’s not accidental. Did you see the last kiss between Harry and Ron up near the Astronomy tower?”

“I swear there were tongues in that one and I bet they were just headed up to have a nice snog.”

“So, it sounds as if the first half of the prank is working well and not really pissing anyone off. Care to fill me in on part two?” Lee asked the smirking twins.

“We get Snape!” Fred and George said in unison.

“How?” Lee gasped, his eyes wide.

“Step one,” Fred began. “We hid at least fifty sprigs of mistletoe in the regular path between his quarters and his classroom. He won’t be able to dodge them all down there; it’s too dark to see them.”

“Step two,” George continued. “We slipped an infatuation potion into Draco Malfoy’s pumpkin juice. It’s got a few of Snape’s greasy hairs in it and it’s not a full on love spell so it’s not technically illegal.”

“Let me get this straight,” Lee asked trying to wrap his mind around the devious plans of his best friends. “You’re going to catch Malfoy snogging Snape? That’s brilliant.”

“Got a camera ready and everything,” Fred smiled.

“We’re planning on making at least three-hundred copies and hanging them all over school!”


Snape wasn’t afraid of the Weasley twins. He also wasn’t stupid. He knew they were up to something by the way they’d been smirking at him all through dinner. He figured it had something to do with the damned mistletoe that was trapping people all over the castle. Worse he was pretty sure it also had something to do with Malfoy. Draco had also been eyeing him all through dinner. When Snape had looked over and raised an eyebrow in a questioning manner, Draco had blushed and ran out of the great hall. As soon as dinner was finished, Snape decided to spend the rest of the night hiding in his room. As soon as he got to the shadier part of the dungeons, he lit his wand and carefully avoided all mistletoe.

“Hello, Professor.”

Snape spun around and found Draco leaning sensuously, or at least as sensuously as a fourteen-year-old boy is capable of, against the wall. He wasn’t wearing his robes, just a black dress shirt, which was unbuttoned down to his navel, and a pair of black trousers that were dangerously snug. Snape felt a twinge of fear go through him as he saw the whole of the twins plan fall into place. He was about to very rudely tell Draco to ‘sleep it off’ when he felt the familiar tingle of magic slide around him. He glanced up. He had stepped right into the trap. He was caught in the Mistletoe Charm with an obviously potioned Draco harboring a desperate desire to shag the potions master into the floor of the dungeons.

“Your eyes positively sparkle in the light from your wand,” Draco took a step forward. “I, also, couldn’t help but notice you are stuck under some mistletoe.”

“No, not stuck this isn’t that sticking charm mistletoe.”

Draco closed the distance between himself and his potions master. He trailed a finger up Snape’s chest. “Then move!” Draco smirked.

“Bugger it all!” Snape breathed, awaiting his inevitable demise.

“That’s the plan,” Draco stated, leaning forward and kissing Snape square on his lips.

The second Snape felt the spell break, he shoved Draco off and stepped away from the mistletoe. “Draco Malfoy, go to your dorm and sleep it off. You’ve been given an infatuation potion and I personally have never been attracted to prepubescent boys.” Snape turned on his heel and very carefully snaked his way back to his room, silently praying to whatever deity may be listening that no one saw any of it.


Fred, George and Lee sniggered their way up to Gryffindor tower looking at the moving pictures of Malfoy seducing Snape. They were going to be excellent decorations for the great hall.
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